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PORTRAIT OF THE CONGRESS AS A WRUNG HAND


"C is for Congress, not good enough for me."
Specialist Dan "the Man" Walker and friend brandish their Victory Fists while taking a breather on an Iraqi sofa during clearing ops in Baghdad, fall 2006

There is hardly such a thing as a war in which it makes no difference who wins.
-George Orwell


They say on Capitol Hill if you don't like the bellwether, just wait a few minutes. It may be a congresswoman's prerogative to change her mind, but Thelma & Louise couldn't wait to take on Saddam Hussein's Iraq in 2002; though now that it's "George Bush's Iraq" they're worse than that guy in Memento with the perpetual short-term memory. Newspeak your mind, and the rest will follow.

We no longer support the war; we have never supported the war.

Big Brother, where art thou? 'O, there you are.

But just when it finally occurs to Iraqi leaders to start closing off their borders with Iran and Syria to staunch the constant influx of foreign illegals, President Bush's "first instinctual" is to "proposition a guest worker program for undocumented insurgence." What, no martyr left behind? Hmm, maybe not such a bad idea, really. Give us your poor, your tired, your befuddled masses yearning to eat hot lead from an AC-130 Spectre gunship...

Meanwhile back in Gotcha City, the World's Greatest Derivative Body spent three stemwinding days of debate over their unbinding nonsolution for Iraq. But really, what's to debate? Their firmness of purpose over the last four years has been about as resolute and binding as Army Lieutenant Watada's Oath of Allegiance. Ironically, one of my own New Year's resolutions (also nonbinding, mind you) was to quit being surprised by the utter uselessness of our elected profiles in discouragement.

But lest anyone forget, they support their tropes -- troops! They love the troops! Yay troops!

Unlikely as it seems, it turns out there is the occasional House Rep. with some actual timber in his member. "People don’t like losers," says Indiana Congressman Mike Pence, helping to explain the perpetually sour approval numbers of his colleagues. "But they like quitters even less." You know, I checked the latest Zogby poll and it turns out he's right. Here's the breakdown within the unpopularity vote:
  • Lawyers -- 23%
  • Losers -- 8%
  • Lobbyists -- 12%
  • Taxes -- 34%
  • Hurricanes -- 19%
  • Congress -- 38%
  • Quitters -- 9%
  • Lawyers who used to be in Congress but are now lobbyists -- 46%
  • John Kerry -- 11%
[Totals exceed 100% due to the patented Zogby Poll probability matrix that relies heavily on Tarot cards and Yahtzee dice.]

Actually, losers and quitters are pretty much in a statistical dead heat, which is fitting due to the fact that losing and quitting more often than not leads to the same result. When Orwell said that "the quickest way of ending a war is to lose it," he just as easily could have substituted "the easiest way of losing a war is to quit it."
Resolved by the House of Representatives (the Senate concurring), that
(1) Congress and the American people will continue to support and protect the members of the United States Armed Forces who are serving or who have served bravely and honorably in Iraq; and
(2) Congress disapproves of the decision of President George W. Bush announced on Jan. 10, 2007, to deploy more than 20,000 additional United States combat troops to Iraq.
The measure passed 246-182, with the complicity of 17 House Republicans. Ouch. That last part stings.

So does this mean they do want us to succeed or they don't? Well hey, at least they're going to keep "supporting and protecting" us! Whew, that's a load off.

But did I miss something, or did 246 of our co-commanders-in-chief just preemptively censure a "troop surge" that has yet to even take effect? As my fellow Geronimo buddies used to say, too many Cochises, not enough Indians.

"This may become the first time in the history of the United States Congress that it has voted to send a new commander into battle and then voted to oppose his plan that is necessary to succeed in that battle." I'll allow that President Bush is no historian, but I'm pretty sure he's correct. If the Pelosi Bunch is so sure of their position, why did they not put their mouths where our money is and reject Gen. Petraeus outright, coax Wesley Clark out of retirement with a vintage "We Like Ike" campaign button, and then withhold funds and turn out the lights, roll over, and go to sleep?

I'm sorry, hon, is the war giving you a headache? Every time I hear Pork Chop Hillary delivering a speech in her trademark claws-on-chalkboard falsetto I retain a small measure of sympathy for Bill. I feel your pain, Bubba. Really, I do.

But the pigeonholing tonsilhawks in Congress see no contra in their diction. Love the postman, hate the mail. It's the same logic that underpins their entire foreign policy. If you ignore it, it will go away.

They're already wagging their fingers and wringing their hands over what they see as our mission creep into a war footing with Iran. But Iranian influence is already playing war footsie with our soldiers in the field, and has been for quite some time. Every street gawker and beat walker in Baghdad knows this, as well as anyone who's ever rode in convoys hit with Iranian-imported EFPs, less commonly known as Express From Persia's.

But don't expect any stalwart leadership on this thorny issue from the Hill, the majority of whom are clearly more concerned with CYOA than V-GWOT. Or as Confucius say, faced with what is right, to leave undone show lack of courage.

When viewed from home, war not determine who in right. War only determine who on Left.

So I had to make some "subtle" changes in my site layout due to the fact that I forgot the cardinal rule of upgrading: "Finally out of beta!" really means "All new bugs for you to sort out on your own. Good luck, sucker!"

As such, I'm back to Old Blogger, but at least with a better look than the old, old site (I hope).

I'm going to be a good boy now and stop messing around with things that are way over my head technically.

After getting up off the floor due to laughter all I can say is "Amen, Brother"!

Ah, Buck...wish Congress would take a lesson from you and stop messing around with the Military and war...something that is over their heads technically and otherwise. How do they get their pant on in the mornings? Told you, while you were over there fighting your ass off that the "troops" back home (American registered voters) were sitting on our asses and losing it for you...You were fighting for to protect us and obviously we were fighting to get people elected who would protect you, our fighting men. Aren't you proud of us? Hence the present Congress!...if you really want to call them Congress, Buck. We call them something else, not printable here. Traitors is about as close as we can get on your comment page without you deleting us. Love your way with words, Buck! You make us laugh all the way to the store to buy our prayer rags...err rugs..next edict from Congress.
Annie

Hooha Buck
I have been following the progress of our troops and quite frankly you guys are stunning. Absolutely fantastic. It is terribly
unfortunate what recently transpired from the "sins" of the Republicans through 6 wasted years of power, however, what the enemy intends to use for bad God is going to turn it around for the good.

Your post is a good stinging rebuke to those in the House that are anti-American/God/Military. The Repubs are scum for defecting no doubt. But at least we have a good scorecard to work with as to whom needs to be targeted OUT of the Congress.

All the political bull**t has to stop. You guys are doing a job that many of us can not do. And you all make it look so easy. The Islamof**ks have been at war for CENTURIES and they have the patience. Here's a great article that proves the point, short and sweet:
'The Americans love Pepsi Cola, but we love death' http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2001/09/24/wbin124.xml.

One of the best I've read that explains how these Islamof**ks think or worse yet know they have us beat. Add to the mix, as has been said, The Islamo-Dem's and voila' you have quitters and losers.

Well there are many of us in the USA Buck that know you guys are winners and hug each and everyone of you upon your return. You are heroes to many in this country. Don't give in to the propaganda these sorry ass congresscritters are spewing. A better day is coming!

THANKS BIG TIME!
AUSPATRIOTMAN
LLOYD

I'm disgusted with the House vote yesterday. I wrote my Surrender Democrat that his vote, and others like it, to show a lack of support for our troops and their mission, has turned me into a political activist. I will be working to get him, and others like him, voted out of office. I also let him know that, as a proud member of The Victory Caucus, I am not alone.

Buck.....I have been reading your blog for about a month now and I love it! Not just what you write which is dead on and so intellect and FUNNY but your videos and all your pics of you and your sweet strong wife. I can say you truly have my respect on many fronts and that doesn't happen often. Call me jaded from 11 yrs of being a cop's wife. I will pray for you and your sweet wife and all of the troops and support them in all the ways I can. Thanks again for all that you do. DSM KC MO

Nice piece of writing! You have a unique style that makes it your own.

I've quoted you and linked to you here: http://consul-at-arms.blogspot.com/2007/02/re-portrait-of-congress-as-wrung-hand.html

They "see no contra in their diction" - hilarious! Wonderfully written and right on target.

Buck Sargent you are wise beyond your paygrade. I have banged my head against the editorial wall of my local rag with the "Saddam must go" statements from Clinton and Co from 1998 right up to the Thunder run only to be told I'm cherrypicking. The antics of the majority party this weekend are obscene. My fear is just as a glimmer of hope appears with Gen Petreus and the surge, it will all be for naught including the 3100 deaths just so the Democrats can say "Geroge Bush failed". Please Joe Lieberman, cross the aisle, caucus with the Republicans and take that house away from the traitorus democrats.

Buck~
Once again ~ beautifully stated! I never know exactly what topic you are going to approach, but I always find your views insightful!

Just heard two talking heads arguing over what Congress did and supporting the troops:

Rep: Supporting the troops means we are being shot at and you are deciding if we get bullets...

Dem: Yeah - this is a democracy - that's how we do it.

What did we do to deserve this level of idiotic debate? Oh yeah - most of America didn't bother to vote.

I hope you have seen the message released by the commander of the American Legion - GREAT READ! I have it posted today.

(You didn't like new Blogger?! It gives me fits - it is like a child that throws tantrums - you never know when, where, how or why it is going to happen or what it is going to do!)

"You didn't like new Blogger?! It gives me fits..."

Yeah, plus I realized it was making me lazy code-wise. I learn more about HTML and the like in a single given week on the old blogger than I ever will on new, simply because they now try to do everything for you. So while they've made the basics much easier for the masses, if you ever want to try anything off the beaten path you're going to have no idea how to do it.

Basically, I elected to stay with the canvas rather than the paint-by-numbers. Plus, we're only really having this discussion because I'm too darn cheap to pay for my own blogging template through TypePad or Movable Type.

Hey Buck-

Have I told you lately how freakin' brilliant you are? Do I really need to tell you? Aw heck, you probably already knew that.

I especially love your blatant love for Hillary.

Thanks for another entertaining read.

Hey, Buck! I've been too angry at the so-called Congress to make any kind of decent comment, but this post lightened me up just a smidge. You're entirely too clever.

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"Public sentiment is everything. With public sentiment, nothing can fail; without it, nothing can succeed." -- Abraham Lincoln